5 THINGS YOUR BOUDOIR PHOTOGRAPHER DOESN'T WANT TO YOU TO KNOW...
1. WHEN WE CANT SHARE YOUR BEAUTY, WE DIE A LITTLE ON THE INSIDE
As Boudoir photographers, its our mission to help you, that's the bottom line. We want to provide you timeless imagery that you'll cherish for the rest of your life, that brings you joy, pride, confidence, sexiness and the list goes on. We understand that for a lot of people, just mustering up enough courage to do a shoot is nerve wracking enough, let alone allowing your images to....BE SHARED? *insta-death*
While you may have the utmost love-hate...or maybe hate-hate relationship with your body at this time, as boudie 'togs, we accept and appreciate all bodies already and see you as beautiful, even if you've been denying it. We are more than ready to show you too, if you will allow yourself the opportunity to invest in yourself.
Being able to show our clients off helps us, help more amazing people just like you. Someone out there could possibly be contemplating a shoot and could see YOUR photos and then realize they too are worthy of a shoot.
Now with all that being said, we still have a top priority to respect your photos and your privacy and if you don't want them to be shared in any capacity, that's totally fine. Just know that the tiniest piece of us died not being able to share your beautiful photos, but we know you will enjoy them to the fullest.
2. YOUR BACK IS GOING TO REMEMBER WHAT YOU DID THE DAY PRIOR
While you sit there and death scroll contemplating all the poses that you would want to get for your upcoming boudoir session, one thing that you may not actually be thinking is "How is my body going to feel afterwards?
Let's pre-face this with the fact that boudoir is accessible for everyone and if you do have mobility issues, this is definitely something that you should discuss with your photographer up front. We do pre-plan (loosely) most of your session which includes what type of poses we are looking to achieve. If you have mobility restrictions, being up front allows your 'togs to preplan poses that work within your needs.
Now, as you sit there and scroll through your feed and start to see images like these...
You may start to notice a pattern with some posing...that back gets a workout. Now again, if you know you have a bad back, be vocal! Otherwise we will still tell you to stretch before and after your session, but you probably won't listen. We want what's best for you and wouldn't just say it because. We want you to get the best experience you can. So be kind to yourself and your body and show it love in more than one way.
3. TONS OF ALCOHOL, ISNT THE ANSWER
Its the end of your shift the day before your session. You took the entire day off and you're ready to party with the ladies, ALL NIGHT LONG because...fuck it, you don't have work tomorrow and you just want to loosen up.
Ok, yes, we're not your mother and we can't actually tell you what to do and we don't want it to come across like that. Ultimately you know your body better than anyone else, but if you're like most people a good night of drinking will result in the next day feeling like crap, sporting a good headache and the...BLOAT.
As boudoir photographers, part of our job is posing and cutting down those "extra ten pounds" everyone's always talking about, but one thing that can definitely get in the way of many things, not just photos... is bloating. It's almost 100% something that's not going to get edited, but it also may affect how you feel, how your outfits may fit and how you "show up" mentally to your session.
Most boudoir experiences do offer alcohol to some degree, whether it be wine, champagne, mimosas or some other tasty treats. But you also won't be getting slammed to push through your anxiety and let all inhibitions go. A moderate amount to enhance your experience should do just fine.
Showing up to your session far too under the influence of drugs or alcohol will probably have your photographer telling you to go home and hopefully they reschedule you without charge. Not only is it a waste of your photographer's time, you most likely wouldn't be satisfied with your photos.
4. ITS ALOT LESS SEXY THAN YOU THINK
The imagery that we shoot as boudoir photography most of the time, is sexual and sensual in nature to some degree. That is a given. We all have imaginations and sexual fantasies, that's one of the things that makes us human beings. Regardless of how deep your box of kinks goes, we do have to clear up some misconceptions.
A professional boudoir photographer is going to already know your comfort level before ever taking a photo and will stay in that range. We have all heard stories of a GWC "Guy with a camera" just using a camera as a way into the bedroom. Well if that's what you were hoping for, here to burst your bubble, because that's not how it works.
Is it likely that you will get topless? Probably.
Is it likely that you will get nude? Probably.
Is it going to fill your sexual fantasy? Probably not.
Boudie 'togs know that you don't want to regret missing out on anything in your session, so we will sometimes ask if you want to push your comfort level and for most clients, in our experience, do indeed go for the shot they thought they wouldn't in a million years attempt. But at that point, all the fears you had walking into the session are already gone.
Now before you think "oh how risque", as boudoir photographer's we've already seen a load of naked bodies. It's not shocking to us, our eyes aren't going to melt out of our heads and we're not going to start salivating either. We might say "Damn, there you go, own it!" After we tell you what pose it will be that you're going to be attempting, we're probably going to be talking about where you like to get your favorite ice coffee or what song you want to listen to next.
5. EVEN YOUR BOUDOIR PHOTOGRAPHER GETS ANXIOUS IN FRONT OF THE LENS
Don't be fooled. While boudoir photographers can talk the talk, its not as easy to walk the walk. Many boudoir photographers are just as nervous as you are to get in front of the lens, whether its their own or another.
We are human beings just like you with our own bodies that we have emotions and thoughts about. Now hopefully the boudoir photographer that you're choosing is just as accepting of themselves as they are of you, otherwise that would be a conflicting message. It is indeed difficult to step away from hiding behind the lens and taking the time to capture yourself, but important non the less. If we as boudoir photographers are not willing to step in front of the lens, how can we possibly ask you to not only...get in front of our lens but also allow us to share your photos, if we can't do the same?
Stepping out of your comfort zone is where true growth happens, if we can't own that with you, we don't deserve to be your photographer.
No matter what you look like or feel like, your body has always been there with you. Show it the love that it deserves, because it's not going to look like that forever. Whether you love or hate it, we are all subject to time and this version of you will phase out and you will grow into a new one.
So make sure you don't miss your opportunity to capture it!
IF YOU'RE READING THIS AND DIDNT ALREADY QUIT, THEN YOU'RE READY FOR YOUR SESSION
NOW LETS SHIFT GEARS AND EXPLORE THE POSITIVE IMPACT THAT BOUDOIR PHOTOGRAPHY CAN HAVE ON YOU.
Boudoir photography isn't just about capturing beautiful images; it can also be a life-changing experience. Here are 6 ways boudoir photography can positively impact you:
BOOSTS CONFIDENCE AND SELF-ESTEEM.
Boudoir photography sessions can help boost your confidence by highlighting your beauty, sensuality, and uniqueness. Seeing yourself through the lens of a skilled photographer can lead to a more positive self-image. This fosters self-acceptance: Boudoir photography celebrates your body as it is, emphasizing self-acceptance and appreciation for your physical attributes, curves, and imperfections. Allow us as photographers of the human form to capture all your highlights and flaws, combined this IS your beauty.
ENCOURAGES SELF-EXPRESSION
Boudoir allows you to express your sensuality, personality, and creativity in a safe and controlled environment. You can experiment with different poses, outfits, and styles that reflect your unique identity. With no fear of judgement, this allows you the opportunity, to find exactly how it is you like to be seen and show off. We are always so afraid of what other's are going to think...of this or that. Damn that all to hell and allow yourself the freedom to be you!
PROMOTES BODY POSITIVITY AND STRENGTHENS YOU
Boudoir photography promotes body positivity by showcasing that beauty comes in all shapes and sizes. It can challenge unrealistic beauty standards and encourage self-love. We've all grown into a world where there is a comparison at every angle that we look, on our feeds, on billboards, on the tv. Allow yourself the chance to reconnect with your body and fight off "the standard". You ARE your standard, so capture it forever baby.
Accepting your body for what it looks like today will also help you overcome insecurities that you have. By letting these negative thoughts fall to the way side, it frees you up and makes you lighter. Living in a world where you're not constantly hating on the vessel that gets you around. By doing this, it leads to more positives showing up in your life.
Participating in a boudoir session can be highly liberating for women. Breaking out of those society norms and finally embracing your sensual side without judgement can lead to a new empowered you. Seeing yourself in a new light will lead to more positive changes in other areas of your life. By not stopping yourself from this change, you will experience a fresh perspective on your body, beauty, and sensuality freeing you to become the best version of yourself. The person stops you the most, is you....and that stops today.
ENHANCED INTIMACY
Boudoir photography is an amazing art form that brings value to people's lives in more than one way. If you're lucky enough to have found another person that brings you more joy than you can imagine, hold them close! Boudoir photography can help enhance the intimacy in your relationship in a couple ways.
The first is being able to share your photos with your significant other or others, which can add some spice in and out of the bedroom. How about sending your hubby a steamy pic or two on his lunch break and then when you get home and that pent up energy needs to be released, you can tease him with one more photo and then ravish him. Tease him for months to "cum" with all your saucy photos.
The second is doing a boudoir session with your partner and capturing your chemistry forever. Doing a session with your partner "can" be more sexy than a regular session and with a little less structure, with the focus more on allowing the couple to "be" themselves and capturing the subtleties, a smirk here, a squeeze there. For some couples, this may also be WAAAY out of their comfort zone and is exactly what they need to bring their relationship to the next level. Consider it the ultimate ice breaker. If you're not a "vanilla" couple than you can look to boudoir to capture what you already know you love and have sultry images to look back on when you're old and grey together. Bring out the whips, chains and chokers.
BUILDS TRUST
Whether you're doing a solo session or one with others, trust needs to be involved at every angle. If you are someone that struggles with trust, doing a boudoir session can help you get better. With the content of boudoir imagery, it can be considered sensitive for many people. You need to have the trust that your boudoir photographer is going to get done everything that they promised while also handling your images with care and storing them securely. You also need to trust your photographer and team in the moment as they instruct and pose you to greatness.
ENCOURAGES SELF CARE
Boudoir photographer's hear it all the time. "I've never put on make up before"...."I'm not a girly girl"...."I've never styled my hair like this"...."I've never worn lingerie...." Leading up to your session, you will likely be partaking in more self care than you're used to. That may include, getting nails and toes done, shaving places you may not shave as much as you normally do, plucking eyebrows, getting a tan, getting that wax, etc. Not only is it fun to do, but it's also beneficial for our health and also how we see ourselves, positive reinforces more positive....see the pattern? All the self care to get ready for your session will "rub off" on you and you will continue to provide more self-love. When we remember to take care of ourselves, we show up better for the ones we love, it is not selfish, it's SELF-CARE. Some of us need to hear this more than others.
CAPTURING MILESTONES
This kind of ties into some other topics, but we think it deserves it's own section. Boudoir is commonly used as a celebration tool for women. You probably already have a bride in mind, when you think of milestones. Getting married is a very popular reason to get a session. Here are some others: before, during and after getting pregnant, birthdays, a gift to a significant other, anniversaries, getting out of a toxic relationship, promotion at work, quitting/switching your job, graduating from school, photos for your line of work... or damn it...just because you want to!
IT WILL BE FOREVER
When you're in the middle of session and you're letting your nerves dissipate, the last thing that's on your mind is that these photos will be forever. While that may sound like the scariest thing that you've ever read in your entire life. Think about it, we've already hinted at in this article. You're not going to be the age you are forever, we are ALL GETTING OLDER. When you are much much older (wishing all a long life), you are going to be very happy you took the leap of faith to capture yourself at different stages of your life and didn't wait until you had regrets. Not to get all doom and gloom, but fuck it, we're all going to die at some point and then once that happens, who cares right? So just go for it, future you will thank you forever
In conclusion, boudoir photography can be a transformative and empowering experience that not only captures your beauty but also enriches your life in countless ways. It's a journey of self-discovery, self-love, and celebrating the unique individual that you are. But also remember that boudoir photography should be done for yourself, not to meet external expectations or pressures. Prioritize your comfort and consent, and choose a professional photographer who values your well-being through the process.